I enjoyed my two week break from following a diet plan and indulging in the tastes of the season. My plan was to be back on the straight and narrow starting today, as I would be back to work and into a routine.
Except that I never made my meals yesterday. I just still have no energy from the silly cold I've had for a week now and didn't ever get enough motivation together yesterday to get up from the couch and make them. Today I didn't go to work, because I just can't shake this cold.
However, this is bad because the longer I go without getting back on track, the less likely I feel like I'll be able to pull myself up by my bootstraps and get back on it. When I went off the diet the week before Thanksgiving, I had supreme motivation to try hard again when I got back. Now, I just don't have that. I'm missing the motivation and the energy and the positive attitude I need to get started. I haven't worked out (aside from my New Years' resolution of daily 30 second planks, which I am hating, by the way) since Sunday a week ago. That is definitely the longest I've gone since I started this journey.
Aside from the lack of energy, I think I'm mostly just afraid. Afraid of trying and failing. Afraid that I will never make it to 100 pounds lost (let alone what I need to lose beyond that.).
I may not be updating the blog every day from now on. It's harder to be motivating when I'm floundering, plus I feel like I just keep saying the same things over and over.
Jill,
ReplyDeleteI love you friend! Don't worry about the valleys because they wouldn't be so if there weren't mountains on either side of them.
Wow. That was profound. HA!
But really, fear is a very powerful thing. It's important that you're able to distinguish if fear is subconsciously sabotaging you're plans. It's a very scary thing with extreme weight loss because you don't have it to hide behind anymore. You have to put yourself out there.
I have total confidence in you. You are an amazing person on the inside and you're getting your outside to match it. You can totally rock 100 lbs lost and even more. You're awesome!
(Everything I want to write sounds cheesy... but I can't NOT write so here is what I feel needs to be said.)
ReplyDeleteJill, just like April, I have total confidence in you. I am praying that you can shake this cold and the negativity that is keeping you down. I pray that you will have energy and motivation to get back to working out and that YOU LOVE IT like you have loved it in the past!
You have a whole support team behind you - cheering you on and believing in you.
You can do this.
I love you.
Words of Jesus:
ReplyDeleteDo not be afraid.
Don't give up! You have come way to far. Everyone hits a low point but I know that you can make it through this.
ReplyDelete