Books of 2014

December 31 means it's time to publish the annual book list! I'm excited to see that my keeping track of my books has inspired a few others to do the same.  My goals this year were to read less and to read more of the books that I own and are sitting on my bookshelf.  I did pretty well in both respects.  Here are the books of 2014 with recommendations at the end.

1. Tell the Wolves I’m Home by Carol Brunt Rifka (re-read)
2. Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us by Daniel Pink (non-fiction)
3. Wishful Drinking by Carrie Fisher (non-fiction)
4. The Fault in Our Stars by John Green (re-read, YA)
5. Sandition: Jane Austen’s Last Novel Completed by Jane Austen and Another Lady
6. The Inheritance by Louisa May Alcott
7. Joy School by Elizabeth Berg
8. A Wedding in December by Anita Shreve
9. Trading Up by Candace Bushnell
10. One More Thing: Stories and Other Stories by B.J. Novak
11. Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail by Cheryl Strayed (non-fiction)
12. Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers
13. Wonder by R. J. Palacio (YA)
14. Defending Jacob by William Landay
15. Crooked Letter, Crooked Letter by Tom Franklin
16. Graduates in Wonderland: The International Misadventures of Two (Almost) Adults by Jessica Pan and Rachel Kapelke-Dale (non-fiction)
17. Lady Thief by A.C. Gaughen (YA)
18. Delicious! by Ruth Reichl
19. How I Got Skinny, Famous and Fell Madly in Love by Ken Baker (YA)
20. Kisses from Katie: A Story of Relentless Love and Redemption by Katie Davis (non-fiction)
21. The Door Within by Wayne Thomas Batson (YA)
22. Princess Academy by Shannon Hale (Re-read and YA)
23. Palace of Stone (Princess Academy #2) by Shannon Hale (YA)
24. This is Where I Leave You by Jonathan Tropper
25. A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World by Paul Miller (non-fiction)
26. The Silkworm by Robert Galbraith
27. Hyperbole and a Half: Unfortunate Situations, Flawed Coping Mechnanisms, Mayhem, and Other Things that Happened by Allie Brosh (non-fiction)
28. The Rise of the Wyrm Lord (the Door Within #2) by Wayne Thomas Batson (YA)
29. The Memory Keeper’s Daughter by Kim Edwards
30. The Final Storm (The Door Within #3) by Wayne Thomas Batson (YA)
31. If I Stay by Gayle Forman (YA)
32. The Silver Crown by Robert O’Brien (YA)
33. Where She Went (If I Stay #2) by Gayle Forman (YA)
34. Lead Small by Reggie Joiner (non-fiction)
35. Unbroken: A World War II Story of Survival Resilience and Redemption by Laura Hillenbrand (non-fiction)
36. My Brilliant Friend by Elena Ferrante
37. Bloom: Finding Beauty in the Unexpected- A Memoir by Kelle Hampton (non-fiction)
38. Emma by Jane Austen
39. On the Edge of the Dark Sea of Darkness (The Wingfeather Saga #1) by Andrew Peterson (YA)
40. Jacob Have I loved by Katherine Paterson (YA)
41. North! or Be Eaten (the WIngfeather Saga #2) by Andrew Peterson
42. Let’s Pretend the Never Happened: A Mostly True Memoir by Jenny Lawson (non-fiction)
43. A Long Way Down by Nick Hornby 
44. Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell (YA)
45. Mrs. Lincoln’s Dressmaker by Jennifer Chiaverini
46. Shopaholic to the Stars (Shopaholic #7) by Sophie Kinsella
47. The Shadow Throne (The Asendance Triology #3) by Jennifer Nielsen
48. Olivia Joules and the Overactive Imagination by Helen Fielding
49. The Slow Regard of Silent Things by Patrick Rothfuss
50. I Am the Messenger by Markus Zusak
51. All Fall Down by Jennifer Weiner
52. The Vacationers by Emma Straub
53. Yes Please by Amy Poehler (non-fiction)
54. This is What Happy Looks Like by Jennifer Smith
55. The Thousand-Dollar Tan Line (Veronica Mars #1) by Rob Thomas
56. The Blood of Olympus (Heroes of Olympus #5) by Rick Riordan (YA)
57. This Star Won’t Go Out: The Life and Words of Esther Grace Earl by Esther Earl (non-fiction and YA)
58. The Good Luck of Right Now by Matthew Quick
59. Tenth of December by George Saunders
60. Reached (Matched #3) by Ally Condie
61. The Bible by God and various artists (non-fiction)
62. One Amazing Thing by Chitra Banerjee DivakarunI

2014 was definitely the year of the amazing memoirs for me.  Everything that I recommended to people throughout the year and a lot of what I read was memoirs. Here are the best memoirs I read this year: 

Graduates in Wonderland by Jessica Pan and Rachel Kapelke-Dale

Wild by Cheryl Strayed

Unbroken by Lauren Hillenbrand

Hyberbole and a Half by Allie Brosh

I also, as always, read quite a bit of fantasy, especially YA fantasy.  My favorite was The Wingfeather Saga. On the Edge of the Dark Sea of Darkness is the first, but North! Or Be Eaten! is also ridiculously good. The third and fourth books in this series aren't carried by my library yet, so I'm waiting patiently on those.

Honorable mentions:
A Praying Life by Paul Miller

Wonder by RJ Palacio

One More Thing: Stories and Other Stories by BJ Novak

Let's Pretend this Never Happened by Jenny Lawson

I Am the Messenger by Markus Zusak

I re-read several books this year. Anything that I re-read is definitely a recommendation. 

Camp Horizon 2014

I just got home from Camp Horizon, a sleepaway summer camp for children ages 10-17 who have Down Syndrome. It was an experience that ran the emotional gamut, but, spoiler alert, I'm so glad I did it.

When I told coworkers and friends over the last few weeks that I was going to Camp Horizon, I usually mentioned my 3-year-old niece Natalie who has DS and said something like, "I don't know anyone with Down Syndrome besides Natalie, so I want to go and see what kind of future she could have." And then I probably also mentioned how I felt like I was born to go to camp (because of all the swimming and fun activities).

I'm ashamed to say that both of those answers lacks much thought about the campers, how they would experience camp, how I would help take care of them, and how much their sweet smiles would mean to me.

The main thing I learned about children with Down Syndrome?  They're not that different from typically developing kids.  They have to be told (usually repeatedly) to brush their teeth and to go to bed. Some are really sweet and some can be stubborn, but most are a mix of both. Most love the movie Frozen, and can sing "Let it Go" with a passion and intensity that makes you not mind the fact that it will be stuck in your head for the next 3-5 days.  They love to giggle.  They love to explore.  They love to hug and high five. Most importantly, they're all different and unique like all of us are.

I was also blown away by my fellow counselors.  Everywhere I looked, I witnessed acts of love, acts of service, acts of kindness and acts that made me say "awww" internally.  These counselors chased kids who love to run all over camp, faced fears by going down the big water slides when their campers asked them to accompany them, served food, braided hair, wiped snot, and coaxed campers out of bed in the morning and into bed in the evening. Being a counselor was not an easy job -- it was actually much harder than I ever expected.  But the satisfaction of seeing your camper's smile after she finally figured out how to fire the bow and arrow or when she has just shot out of the water slide is unforgettable.

They told us in training that campers look forward to Camp Horizon all year long.  Now I will too.  Can't wait for Camp Horizon 2015!

PSA: Camp Horizon is run entirely by volunteers.  Each camper has a volunteer counselor assigned to him or her. If they don't get enough volunteers, campers have to be turned away.  If you're interested in volunteering next August, I'd love to tell you more about my experience and hook you up with the volunteer application for 2015 when it's available.  Let me know. 



PS I'd love to post pictures of the sweet and funny girls from Cabin 1, but I'm not sure about privacy issues with posting pictures of other people's kids on the internet.  
PPS I left a lot of details about camp out of the narrative above, so I thought I'd throw them at you here. Camp Horizon is hosted at the YMCA Camp Harrison at Herring Ridge, a beautiful place in the North Carolina mountains.  Camp activities included: canoeing, horseback riding, fishing, archery, arts and crafts, pool time, the Wet Wily water slide (approximately 20 feet long) into the lake, the giant slip n' slide that went down a mountain into a lake, field day, skit night and a dance party.  This year was Camp Horizon's 10th birthday, and it was awesome. 
PPPS Shoutouts to my friend Stefanie from college and her friends/coworkers Laura and Jaclyn, who with no Down Syndrome connection, flew in from Florida and Illinois to be counselors and brought lots of free Walt Disney World goodies for the campers.

Phenomenal Cosmic Power!

I fell for Robin Williams and fell hard in 1992. It wasn't a romantic attachment, no. I fell for his big, blue wise-crackin' genie.

I don't want to say I was obsessed with him as the Genie*, because obsessed is a word that is way overused in our society and your eyes will just skim over it not understanding.  Let me try and describe. I loved the Genie so much that I bought an action figure.  Then I bought a bank. Then a flashlight.  Then a beach towel.  It continued to escalate from there.  I had my sister sew a Genie costume so I could be him for Halloween.  I watched the movie so many times that I could recite every word.  My sister also hand painted a lamp shade and we filled the empty base with Genie figurines.  I had a Genie-themed birthday party.  His picture still hangs in my bathroom, a mug with his face is still in use, and my Genie bag is still my go to carry-all for the beach or the pool You get the idea. See the picture below if you need further clarification. Note my shiny blue pants worn in his honor.

While the Genie got my attention, that was just the beginning of my love of Robin Williams.  I soon started renting and then buying all of his movies.  I loved "Popeye" a lot.  I laughed at "Good Morning, Vietnam," even though I'm sure I didn't understand most of the jokes. Normally exclusively a Disney snob, I gave "Ferngully" a chance just because of Robin Williams, and I was not disappointed.  "Hook" was a no brainer.  And his talent was not limited to comedy.  I mean, have you seen "Dead Poets Society"?

He followed up Aladdin with "Mrs. Doubtfire" the next year.  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?  "Mrs. Doubtfire" was genius, and I'm only realizing now that I only got about half the jokes at the time.  Later came "Jumanji," "the Birdcage," "Patch Adams" and more  They were good, but nothing really touched me again until "Good Will Hunting," which came out right around the time I went to college. I watched that movie over and over and over.*

I don't think it's overstating it to say that Robin Williams played a small part in helping me become who I am today.  He taught me about quick-witted comedy and of well-timed punch lines.  He was incredibly funny; it just spurted out of him. But he was more than just jokes.  He had heart too.

When I checked Facebook this evening and saw lots of my own friends posting about being sad about his passing, I was a little mad, honestly.  My reaction was, "how dare all of these people post about Robin Williams? They don't know and love him like I do!" Then I realized that
1) I don't know him either, and
2) while I think my love of the characters he played is both very large and very sincere, I don't own that exclusively.  We're all lucky to have shared in his genius on screen.

It's sad that he's gone.  It's sad that we will no longer get to look forward to his next project.*** It's sad that he was so loved by so many people and brought so much joy, but must have struggled personally.

The best way I know to honor him is to pull out some VHS tapes this week to relieve the glory days and laugh with Robin Williams again.


*Did you notice that Robin Williams also voices the narrator who opens the story of Aladdin?  "Ah, Salaam and good evening to you my worthy friends. Please, come closer. Too close, a little too close."
*Partially, admittedly, because of Matt Damon, for which I felt a different kind of love than I did for Robin Williams.
***After Night at the Museum 3 comes out this December.

Thankful for the Things I Love Thursday

Traditionally, here on the blog I wrote Thankful Things Thursday posts.  My friend April more often does Things I Love Thursday.  I've got a lot of lovin' and a lot of thankfulness going on lately, so is it too much to do a Thankful for the Things I Love Thursday post this week? Let's just try it and see what happens.

BFF Amie.

If you know Amie or you've read this blog for any amount of time, you know she's a pretty spectacular person.  At least you may think you know. But ya'll do not even know.  For my 34th birthday last weekend, she planned an all out 3-day extravaganza that involved multiple different groups of friends, many locations all over Charlotte and Rock Hill and all of my favorite things. It was even themed around the ABCs (we did/ate/drank/visited something for every letter of the alphabet).  For just a random ol' 34th birthday.  She did all of this after giving birth to her first child one month ago. It was unbelievable. It was incredibly generous. It was an amazing birthday. I am so thankful for her.

Also, this picture of us, above.  Seriously, I love it.

Ellie B.

Since we're on the subject of Amie, let's talk about her offspring.  Ellie is an adorable and chill baby with a perfectly round head.  And she was at trooper during my birthday extravaganza. She just zipped along with us on all of our adventures, whether in the car seat, stroller, cuddled by one of us or strapped to her mom's chest in one of those carrier things. Look how adorable. How could you not love that face?

My long hair.

I've been trying to grow my hair out for more than a year. Finally, this week, it feels like long hair.  This is definitely the longest it has ever been. Check out the bathroom selfie on the right to see it from the back.  I am looovving it! 

The Mindy Project

This is my show, ya'll.  I love Mindy, I love Danny, I love Mindy and Danny together. I feel like their "Will they or won't they?" routine rivals some of the best television romances out there. And with the sly jokes that are slipped in so quickly you have to watch an episode twice in order to catch them all? It's definitely earned its place as my replacement for the Office. 

Veep

While we're onto television, let me just put in a plug for Veep.  Hi-larious.  So many laughs it's impossible to catch them all. And then when you find someone else who has watched it, you can stand there forever recapping all of the best lines, and you laugh even harder the second time around.  Warning: it does have plenty of adult language.  The worst part is that it's on HBO, so the only way you can catch it is on DVD.  (Lucky for you, I bought the DVDs and am now slowly circulating them around to all of my friends)

Corey Nolen's New Album

I know Corey through work (he's an amazing photographer). He's releasing an album in two weeks. He just released a sampler on Noise Trade and now I listen to it constantly.  I can't wait for the full album to come out. I wish I was good at describing musical sounds in a way that makes you want to listen, but I'm not.  So just check it out on Noise Trade (I think for a limited time, so move quickly!).

Petunias and Puppies

Lastly, two of my birthday gifts, petunias and playing with a puppy (not my puppy, this adorable guy is the child of Jay and Jenny Fricke). Puppies and petunias make me happy.  I'm thankful for them both.

That was a whopper of a post for being completely blog-absent for 2.5 months.  Hope you stuck with it til the end.  Have a great day!

Because I'm Happy...and Brave

In a blog a few weeks ago, I mentioned how I needed to make a dance party play list (I've since taken care of that business).  What I didn't mention was the "selfspirational" playlist I had already started.

It's growing slowly, because I'm only putting songs on there that truly make me feel like I can do anything or will give my mood a complete 180 on bad days, but it's quality stuff.

Here are my two favorites right now.
(by co-inky-dink they are both on the selfspirational playlist and the dance party play list):

Brave by Sara Bareilles
I read an article about this song right before the Grammys (she was nominated for album of the year) that mentioned the video was directed by Rashida Jones, which intrigued me, so I looked it up.  I've been hooked ever since.  The song has a great message and a good beat, but the random people dancing in random places in the video is probably the biggest part of why I fell in love with it. I would love to do my own version as tribute, and I often listen to it on repeat when I'm driving, planning my moves, costumes and locations.
(Let me say that just because I'm planning the video, does not mean it will ever happen. It's just fun to think about.)


Happy by Pharrell Williams
I've only known of this song for six days, but already I have jammed out to it more times that I can count. Just try and listen to it without busting a groove. Impossible.  Now the funny thing is that I looked up the video just tonight for this blog and found it also features random people dancing in random places.  Let me tell you, Pharrell and Sara know the way to my heart.  Enjoy and dance it out.

Try, try again

I think the most prevalent lesson that's being hammered into me lately is to keep on trying.
If you've ever read this blog before, you know that I have an up and down relationship with eating right.  I do it for awhile, see some success on the scale, eventually go back to eating unhealthily and in excess, gain weight, etc.  Each time this happens I feel like a failure.  Then inevitably, after varying periods of eating junk, I have to "re-boot" or "re-start" my healthy eating.  This gets harder and harder to do.

During this period of eating junk and then trying to convince myself to get back on track, there's a lot of self-doubt, fear and basically not nice things that fly around in my head. It would be easier to just give up.  If I stop trying then I can't fail, right? I always think of Evelyn Couch in Fried Green Tomatoes, when she said "I wish I had the courage to get it over with and get really fat."

Unfortunately, not trying isn't really an option. Because if I'm not trying to lose weight then I am basically gaining weight - mostly due to the delicious but unhealthy food that I'm eating.  And my family has a history of diabetes and heart disease, things I don't want to deal with personally.  And when you are overweight like I am, finding clothes that fit and don't look dowdy is hard.  Etc. Etc.  Bottom line is I need to lose weight.

I had the realization a couple of weeks ago, that I feel better when I'm eating as planned simply because I'm at least trying to do something about my weight. I may not have lost 100 pounds yet, but at least I'm working toward the goal. Even though it seems easier when I'm off plan to just continue eating whatever I want (which is always the bad stuff), it makes me feel kind of miserable emotionally because I feel stuck at this unhealthy weight.

So these are things I know to be true, but it doesn't mean this whole healthy eating thing is smooth sailing. It's hard to deny cravings and keep trying.  But keep trying, I must.

Wow, I just put a lot of crazy out there for public consumption.  Please be gentle in your response.

Lesson #2

I know it's January 31 and not January 1, but I seem to be resolving to do a lot of things lately.  I told you last week about how I'm making an effort to live life*, but the other major thing I've been thinking about lately is how I need to choose to be happy.

See, I started noticing that I was complaining a lot.  About work, about people, about neighbors with yappy dogs, about anything that crossed my path, really. And the complaining was bothering me (and if it was bothering me, what was it doing to those who were forced to listen to it?).  One day, I got so sick of this that I stopped mid-story and told the guy I was talking to, "You know what? I feel like all I ever do is complain when I talk to you, and I don't want to be that person, so I'm going to stop talking now."

I think I used to be a naturally happy person.  Now I would describe myself more as a naturally neutral person who tends to gravitate toward the bad side of things instead of the good. I don't like that change.

So for the past couple of weeks, I've had sort of an internal mantra going.  Choose Joy.  When I get irritated or upset or stressed, and I start the internal litany of complaints, I stop and say to myself, "No. Choose joy." And just that thought allows me to change my mindset. To realize that I am in control of my attitude. To focus on the positives.  I am actually really lucky, because the choose joy mantra is something that is coming into my brain on its own.  I think my next step is to set up a dance music playlist (Is it weird that I don't have one already? I feel like this is something I should have) so I can bust out a quick dance party if things are really dire and need to bounce back to Joytown.

I'm not saying I'm never negative now and don't ever complain.  But I am catching myself more often. And catching myself is half the battle. ** This is one of those things that I'll continue to work on for awhile.  Because I want to be a Joyful Jill***, not a Negative Nancy.

*ever since I posted the Live Life lesson, I've regretted that term. How generic is "live life"?  I suppose we are our own worst critics, and you guys got the drift of what I was saying. But of course we need to live life, right? Cause otherwise we'd be dead.
**and the other half is dancing my way back to Joytown, apparently.
***do you ever have to play that game where you pick an adjective that starts with the same letter as your first name? Mine is always Joyful Jill or Jubilant Jill.
****if your name is Nancy, I do not mean to imply that you are negative by nature.  I just like the alliteration.

Lessons I'm learning in 2014

At the end of this, the first month of the two thousand and fourteenth year of our lord, I feel like I'm being a taught a lot of lessons.  Things have been dawning on me lately and I'm going, "you know what? That makes a lot of sense."  I want to record these lessons here for myself, so I'm gonna start a little muti-part series here on the blog. Here's the first thing:

Live Life
As an introvert, my natural tendency is to stay home.  I love my house where I live alone with my dog and my couch and my blankets (among other things. Those are just my favorite things).  I love to read (alone). I love to watch tv (alone). I love to sing while washing the dishes (alone).  There's nothing wrong with any of these activities, there's nothing wrong with being alone, and I do think I need a healthy amount of both to re-energize for work and life in general.

But life has got to be more than that. At least mine does. It's got to be connections with people and stories to tell and experiences that make me laugh.

It seems like, especially as I get older, it's just easier to stay home and do my own thing. To stick to routine instead of sticking my neck out. Which is weird, because I figured out a long time ago that an interesting life is a much better way to go.

So this is one of the lessons I'm learning these days. Live life. Try new things. Meet up with people I haven't seen in awhile, even if it means I have to extend the initial invitation.  Invite people to study a book with you, even if that's kind of a scary thing to put out there. Have experiences that give me new stories to tell.

You know what doesn't matter? How many books I end up reading this year.  Lots of people seemed impressed with my 95 books last year, but my only reading goal for this year is to read less.  Not because I don't value it, but I want to value relationships more.

My first big realization with this lesson came last weekend. My friend Taylor had invited me to come to Atlanta to participate in a flash mob, and I was hesitant at first. It seemed like a long way to go for something silly.  Finally, after I thought about it for almost a whole week, I realized this was a chance to live an interesting life. Why would I pass that up? Let's face it, if I'd stayed home, I probably would've just bonded a little bit more with my couch.

This isn't something that comes easy, but it's something I'm willing to work on. Thoughts?



PS: BTDUBBS, you can thank my friend Cindy for this blog post. She did something for me and instead of letting me repay her, she suggested I offer payment in the form of a blog post a week.  I have missed my blog, so that was a payment plan I was willing to accept.

Made to Crave?

If you know me, or you read my blog, you probably know that this whole healthy eating/healthy living/losing weight and keeping it off thing is a S-T-R-U-G-G-L-E for me. And I dial back the crazy considerably for the blog audience.*

Two years ago I read a book called "Made to Crave" by Lysa Terkeurst.  When I read it, it had a profound impact on my attitude toward food and dieting, etc.  But then I finished the book after a few days, returned to my normal book-diet of easy-to-digest fiction**, and promptly forgot a lot about what I learned.  I remember thinking when I finished it that I should just re-read it continuously forever so I wouldn't forget its truths, but didn't follow through with that.

I pulled it off of my bookshelf a few months ago with the intention of reading it again, but it has sat on my dresser untouched ever since.  I'm having a hard time starting it again, even though I know it would help.

I've been tinkering with an idea - I'd like to read it in conjunction with others for accountability and for discussion.  I know a lot of people face the same struggles with food that I do. I think talking about it helps; I feel less like a weirdo when I share with you guys and you seem to know what I'm talking about.

So, here's the pitch - if you'd like to read Made to Crave along with me, I'd love that.  I would also love if we could gather on a weekly or bi-weekly** to talk about what we're reading.  It's a pretty slim book so it would not be too taxing.  If you're interested, but you live far away, still let me know that you're interested. Maybe we could set up a Facebook group or something to share thoughts.

I don't have any details yet, about where we would meet or what day or how much we should read between meetings, I just want to gauge interest. All of that really depends on the group. If you understand the struggle and you think you maybe kind of could possibly want to join me in reading this, either send me an e-mail [stuckeyjc at gmail.com], a Facebook message or leave a comment below.

I think this book is worth your time.


*You're welcome.
**See what I did there? mixing food metaphors in while talking about books and reading?  Confusing or a seriously effective communication tool? You decide.
***Is bi-weekly the kind that is every other week or the kind that is twice a week? Cause I mean the kind that is every other week.

The above picture was clearly stolen from Amazon. But maybe it helps that the links in the blog point back to Amazon?