The Pendalum

Today I have already swung on both sides of the self confidence pendulum and it's only lunch time.

I started the day before the sun came up (or should I say before the rain started). Coming to upstate NY, where it is supposed to snow on Friday, I had to again pull a winter coat out of the closet. The first one I put on, (yes, I have more than one, but the extras are really old. Like high school and college old) I decided was too big. I put on another and headed out the door. I got drenched waiting for the airport shuttle, and by the time I was rushing through the airport, I was beginning to feel like a toddler wearing her Dad's jacket. Needless to say, I was feeling pretty good in my smallness and proud of how far I've come.

Two hours later, I'm wedged into a seat on a puddle jumper and suddenly feeling like I've never lost any weight. Disgusted and uncomfortable, I'm suddenly mentally bashing the
same body I was so proud of earlier this morning. I think I got a little spoiled on my recent international flights, which, while not roomy, do at least allow you room to breathe

Anyway, it just struck me as odd, the wide variety of thoughts that run through my head. Of course I would prefer to be entirely self confident and in control of these thoughts, but I'm not sure that will ever happen. At least when having these negative thoughts, I can be assured the pendalumn will always swing back in the other direction. That's how pendulums work.

This subject makes me think of the awesome Superchick song, One and Lonely. Here's a sample lyric. It's a great song.
It's not that I don't know beauty is only skin deep
Just the skin I'm in, not the girl within
But one imperfection takes away my grin


*This blog was all typed on my phone while I wait for the fun to begin here in NY. Please excuse any horrible errors and applaud me for my dedication to you, my wonderful blog readers.