Running Revelations

Today I took to the Riverwalk to run three miles in the freezing rain (it was not literally freezing, as the temperature was hovering around 34, but just really cold. Also, it was just sprinkling.)  I had one main goal: to run the whole three miles and not give up on myself.

I ran today when I could've easily stayed home because I've started a new training program for my next 10k, which is in Asheville at the end of January.  You may think that since I've already done one 10k, I would not need to be training hard for the next one.  But I took a couple of weeks off from running in November, and it is amazing how quickly you lose stamina.  Plus I'd really like to be able to run more (or maybe the whole way!) this time. 

Running  is so challenging, not just physically, but mentally. I constantly want to give up, taking the easy way instead. The whole way out to the 1.5 marker, I kept thinking "Just make it to the 1.5 marker and then it will be easy to get back."  When I made the turn at the 1.5 marker and realized how foolish it had been to think that making it back would be easy, a David Crowder Band song came on my ipod, "There is No One Like You." Here are the lyrics:  

You are more beautiful
Than anyone ever
Everyday You're the same
You never change, no never

And how could I ever deny
The love of my Savior
You are to me everything
All I need forever

How could You be so good to me?

There is no one like You
There has never ever been anyone like You

Everywhere You are there
Earth or air surrounding
I'm not alone, the heavens sing along
My God You're so astounding
How could You be so good to me
Eternally I believe that'

There is no one like You
There has never ever been anyone like You
There is no one like You
There has never ever been anyone like You

I sang a few lines at the top of my lungs.  Then I started praying, not for the strength to keep going, but a prayer of thanks for lungs that were pumping air in and out, for my feet that kept propelling me forward even when my brain was wanting to stop, for knees that don't hurt, for a beautiful creation to run in, for the cold air that made me feel alive. We are so loved by the God of the universe, and what is so astounding about it is that we deserve none of it.  

This kept me going for awhile, but then thoughts drifted to other things and eventually to what I would write about on my blog today. I thought this revelation about running and David Crowder and thankfulness would make a good topic and only had about .3/4 of a mile left to go when I came very close to walking again.  This time it was the thought that a blog about trying to run three miles would just not have the ending it needed if I started walking then.  So I kept going and finished the three miles at a run.  

This last week has been hard diet-wise, between not losing any pounds this week and constantly having to fight off cravings and bad attitudes.  It hasn't been easy, but I think it's teaching me a lot that will help me whenever I get to my final goal.  Things about patience and endurance and simple distraction. Big lessons about how I should be eating for fuel and not for fun or boredom or therapy. When I think of this week in these terms, it makes the journey a little easier. 

Forward momentum