So this weekend I spent many hours digging up all of my day lilies and replanting them next to my house. For any of you have ever been to my house, you realize what a massive job that was. For any of you have not been to my house, let me just say that it took me about 11+ hours to do it over the course of two days. Now, when I close my eyes, all I see are day lily roots.
See the day lilies really liked where they were planted, and over the three years they were there, they multiplied like crazy, sending out these little tube-like shoots into the ground. They kind of looked like carrots. And actually, each plant had more than one kind of root, they had a couple each of the carrot-look-a-like kind, but then each one also had about a bajillion of these tiny roots that really gripped the dirt around it.
So over the course of the 11+ hours, I had a lot of time to think. In the beginning, I was angry that I was going to be spending a majority of my weekend working in the yard instead of doing something more exciting. I eventually got over my anger and thoughts gave way to pain (from a blister and from sitting in an awkward position for a long time) and fatigue. Eventually, those thoughts transitioned to food. I immediately determined that I "deserved" to have Zaxby's and milkshake that day and the thought kept me going the rest of the time.
And then I had Zaxby's and a milkshake.
That was Saturday. Sunday was pretty much a repeat, but without anger and with BoJangles instead of Zaxby's. And both of these meals replaced healthy meals that I already had made and sitting in my fridge.
Now coming off of last week when I reached my 90 pound goal, you would think that I would be pretty motivated to continue to eat well, but even after more than a year of this healthier lifestyle my natural instinct is still to go straight for the junk food. Now hold on, cause this is where this blog comes full circle. See, I'm going to posit that I've put down years' worth of "roots" in bad eating. And just like the roots of the day lilies, it's going to take a lot of digging to get them up. And its' going to be tiring, and painful sometimes, and will probably make me angry from time to time. But I've got to keep pushing through, and hope that I can eventually shake all of those tiny little gripper roots someday.
It's all a mental game.
Ha! Finally! First to comment! I know Jesus says that worrying can't add a single hair to your head, but does working angry burn more calories? And, while working on the day lilies took only 11 hours, and you've been on your journey over a year now, I hope it is more pleasant just not traveling alone. LOVE!
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Only 11 hours? Felt like an eternity.
ReplyDeleteI think one of the lessons Jesus has been teaching me lately (or perhaps always) is that it is better to live and work in community. Or, in short, I should ask for help more often. I wish I could have helped you dig up roots. It would have been so much more enjoyable to do it together. Or at least somewhat less miserable.
ReplyDeleteYes. The task was so daunting that I really wanted to ask for help. But it was such a sucky job, that I didn't think I could ask anyone to give up their weekend the way I did.
ReplyDeleteVery nice connections here! The root metaphor was particularly apt, and I do also love you used "posit." I'm enjoying this blog and glad you're writing it!
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