Alyce T. Guettler Hunger Run 5k

Maybe it was too soon to sign up for another 5k, but when they're happening in my hometown, I get a little excited.  Plus, it was the cheapest race fee I'd ever seen.  Thus, the reasons Cindy and I ran the Alyce T. Guettler Hunger Run Saturday morning.

It was the least satisfying race of my short career and my slowest 5k time ever (you know, of the four official 5ks I've ever run.)

It didn't start out that way. Our plan was to run 11 minutes/walk 2 for the duration of the race.  Cindy and I tore off down the course in the beginning.  We ran the first mile in 10:29, according to my watch, which is mega fast for us.  We walked for two minutes, which was according to our plan, and then started off again.

My quads started aching, and we didn't have much to talk about (read: distract me from the horribleness that is running), so I didn't run the entire second 11 minute set. I crapped out about half way through.  This happened last Saturday during a training run too.  I just get to the point where I start thinking about how much farther I have to go, and then I just want to give up because it seems too far (hmmm...kind of like a  metaphor for when you need to lose an extreme amount of weight like I have/do).

Pre-race we are very smiley

But Cindy didn't let me quit and berated (read: encouraged) me to keep going. So after a minute or two of unscheduled walking, we picked it up again.  That second mile wasn't really all that slow either.  But on the third run, I walked a much larger portion, probably more than a quarter mile.  Again, Cindy was strong and kept encouraging me, even though I was not too fun to be around (read: whiney) by this point and I kept telling her to go on ahead without me.

When we got to that final kick-in-the-pants uphill, we agreed to run it and finish strong.  As soon as I could see the clock, I kicked up the speed a notch, and we crossed the line together at 36:08, my slowest time ever.

While I'm not satisfied with my performance, I'm trying not to be too hard on myself.  Some days are just sucky running days and sometimes it happens on race day.  Running is probably never going to be easy or natural for me, but I'm proud of myself for continuing to work hard at it.

Do you know what the best part of the race was? As we headed toward the finish line, and I was already upset with myself for walking so much, Kelly Clarkson's "What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger" played on my ipod.  And I took those words to heart.

Post-race orange slices make things better.
Please note my awesome runner shirt made by David Loy.
And my gigantic and awesome runner's watch (read: Garmin).

Motivation and Rainbows!

It's a good day when it starts with a rainbow sighting on campus!

It stretched from one side of campus to the other and I could see the whole thing! It was beautiful!

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Today my friend Carly re-posted a link to a guest blog a wrote for her a long time ago about motivation. You can read it here, if you want.

Reading it again reinforced something that I've been thinking about all week, which is that you've got to always keep your motivation in front of you.  It is way too easy to go astray with what's fast or tasty.  But if you've determined  WHY you want to lose weight and are committed to that, you have to keep reminding yourself of it.

This week I wrote the reasons why I want to lose weight on my bathroom mirror.  They include things like:
Running will be easier!
My pants don't fit
I want to be happy with pictures taken at my cousin's wedding in April.
I want to fit in the airplane seats to get me to my cousin's wedding in April.
Summer (Thus, less clothing) is coming!
To be the best me that I can be

I'm trying to keep all of that in mind this week and I've done pretty well.  Drinking my water, tracking my calories, eating my veggies/fruits and working out consistently. Whoohoo!

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On the topic of running, tomorrow is my first 5k of 2012!  Cindy and I ran the course together Wednesday night, which was a great idea she had.  It's mostly flatish (flat with little tiny, rolling humps, more than hills), but it ends with what seems like a gigantic uphill (in reality, it's probably not that big, but since it's right at the end, it's a butt kicker.) We're still not ready to run the whole thing, but will be running at least 30 to 33 minutes, which is pretty darn close to the whole thing.  Send good thoughts our way between 9 a.m. and 9:35 a.m. eastern tomorrow morning.

Stay tuned for a race recap later this weekend.

Happy Friday!

Thankful Thursdays: January 26

It's the best day of the week! It's Thankful Thursday!

Today I'm thankful:

For a great run last night.

My previous run before last night was Saturday morning and it was not peachy.  So I'm extra grateful for the super great run I had last night. Cindy and I ran the course we'll run in the Hunger Run 5k on Saturday and now we're ready to storm that course on Saturday!

For a few good days of eating well.

It's amazing how much better you feel, mentally, when you're making decisions that you know are better for you.

For the anticipation of upcoming triathlons

I've been reading my triathlon training book, and I went for a swim yesterday. Both made me excited to try another tri.

For a kick-butt week at work
Work has been crazy busy, but that's a great thing. I love checking stuff off of my to-do list!

For playing actual Scrabble twice this week!
I play A LOT of Words with Friends on my phone, but it's not often I get to play real Scrabble!

I'm sorry I kind of failed on the Thankful pictures this week. I promise to try to do better next week.

What are you thankful for this week?  

The Candy Diet

I need to lose weight. I need to eat healthy. I need to eat candy.

All of those statements are true.  Statements 2 and 3 are going to help me achieve statement 1. I think (hope).

I've written before about how I'm usually all or nothing when it comes to healthy living.  But that strictly- veggies-and-healthy-meals lifestyle can only be maintained for so many days when you love candy and Moe's like I love candy and Moe's.  And then the dam breaks and the water all rushes out.

So instead of ruling candy out of my life all together, I'm attempting to enjoy it in moderation.

Shocking and revolutionary, I know.

I've decided to allow myself one full-size candy bar a day, fitting it into my allotted calories. The reason behind this is, if I go with something smaller, like a fun-size bar, I will either feel slighted, or I will eat much more than just one fun-size bar.  It's just the way it is, and I'm feeling like facing facts these days.

You might say, "Jill, you're a 31-year-old woman. You do not need candy every day."  To that I would say, "Do you really not want candy/chocolate baked goods every day? That is foreign to me. I do not understand the language you speak. beep boop di doop beep boop di doop. Does not compute." (I would also do the Robot while saying that last part.)

All I'm saying is, I'm giving it a try.  Heck, for all I know, this one candy bar a day could be a gateway drug, and I could end up on the streets begging for money to buy a King size bar.  But I'm feeling optimistic, so I'm going to choose to be positive.  I'll let you know how it goes.

What do you think?

Gain By Losing

Each year at this time, Special K runs an ad campaign with the slogan, "What Will You Gain When You Lose?"

The version of the ad at left tells you that you when you lose weight, you will gain, "calm, joy, moxie, sass, shine, drive, pizzazz, oomph, sparkle, excitement, confidence, peace, momentum, pep, glee, spirit, zing, guts, resolve, nerve and hope."

Last year I liked this idea so much that I posted this brief blog about it.  I really felt I had gained these things and more when I lost my 60, 70, 80+ pounds. (Granted, that is a bit more extreme than the average Special K dieter, who might lose 10 or 20 pounds.)

But a few weeks ago, my friend Jess also blogged about the ad, with a different point.  She said, 

"I can't have those things at my current weight? I can't have those things if I gain the weight needed to reach my target weight? I can't have those things simply by focusing more on the important things in life? ... You don't have to lose two pounds, or six pounds, or twelve pounds to have those things."

And every single one of her commenters agreed with her, except me.  I mean, don't get me wrong, I am on her side, I'm picking up what's she's putting down.  I hope you're living a full, happy life no matter what size clothes you wear. I hope you don't feel as though you need to lose weight in order to find joy or peace. What a horrible situation it would be if you did.  

But, I've been thinking about this a lot ever since. To be honest, I AM looking to gain by losing. Otherwise all the crap of measuring portion sizes, counting calories, prepping meals and snacks, planning meals out, fitting workouts in, etc, well it wouldn't be worth it, would it? I don't want to do a whole lot of something for nothing, do I? No one does.

But that makes me ask myself, "What am I hoping to gain?  WHY do I want to lose?"  I feel like the correct answer should be "better health," but you'd be a fool if you believed me.  Yes, abstractly, I think better health  is a good thing. No, I don't want to get diabetes or have heart problems.  But is it something that motivates me daily? Simply, no.

So what do I want to gain?  I think self confidence is a big part of it; feeling comfortable in my clothes, self assured and happy to see pictures of myself again.  Pride in myself and what I can accomplish when I work hard.  Amazement from seeing how far I can run or how much weight I can lift. Daring to try new adventures  or just new clothing styles. 

Losing as much weight as I have lost, and still have to lose now that I've gained quite a chunk back, does change you a bit.  But I don't think that's bad -- before or after the change. It's just all part of the journey.

Now I've talked too long, boring you with all that's been sifting through my head lately. What do you make of it all? Why do you want to lose weight?

The Small Signs Add Up

I didn't need to step on the scale today to know that I have continued gaining weight.*

I'm privy to that little nugget because of a million tiny signs that have been blinking on and off at me for weeks now, like some bug zapper in the back yard. I've just been shutting my eyes to avoid witnessing the death of all of those bugs.  Signs like:

• I hate all of my clothes again. Not because of their color or style, but because of how they make me feel. Every day I wish I could just wear sweatpants and t-shirts.
• I breathe a little sigh of relief when I unbutton my pants.
• My legs are rubbing together when I wear skirts. 
• I've been stretching out my t-shirts when I put them on to give me a little breathing room.
• And today, I realized I can't see my collar bone any more. My beloved collar bone.

If any of you have ever been significantly over weight, then perhaps you recognize these signs too.  All of my hard work from two years ago is slipping away, and I'm just letting it go. I'm not writing this for sympathy from you, though it does seem sad. When I write those little signs out like this, they seem not so little any more, but giant, glaring Las Vegas Strip-style signs.

  

Don't be sad for me. I chose this. I know the consequences that come from eating too many meals out and too much chocolate.**  While I've kept up with my workouts and water, that's not enough to combat the evil calories.

So it's time to rededicate myself again.  Tomorrow is another day. And at the end of it, I just want to be able to say:

*But I did, and I have.
**I just love them both so much.

Thankful Thursdays: January 19

Today I'm thankful:
For my running buddy Cindy

She keeps me going and makes me feel like I've had therapy AND a workout after a run. Someday I'm going to write an amazing post about how amazing Cindy is.  Stay tuned.

That I've learned a bit about the Republican nominees.

Two days ago (or maybe 24 hours ago), I couldn't even keep track of all of the people running. But since South Carolina is in the hotspot, we've had quite a hubub of activity on campus the last few days. First we had Mitt Romney stop by yesterday for a rally in the building where I work.  Today NBC News and MSNBC's Chuck Todd broadcast his "Daily Rundown" from the heart of campus.  I went to watch the taping and now I've finally got all of the candidates straight. Plus, there was some exciting breaking news as they learned about the mess-up in Iowa and Perry's dropping out. (Watch me drop some knowledge on ya!)

This would be a great picture of Mr. Romney if that dude
hadn't thrown up his camera/arm at the last second.

Chuck Todd. Maybe you've seen him on MSNBC or
the Today show?

For having the bright idea to wash my coat to get the embarrassing stains out of it.
So I wore my coat for awhile today while I was outside watching that Chuck Todd taping, and I just kept noticing all of these weird stains (most likely from dropped food at some unknown past meal). I washed it tonight and it's looking brand spanking new now!

That this little girl celebrated her first birthday yesterday

Natalie Grace in a dress my sister MADE.

That I'm running my first race of 2012 next weekend!
The 32nd Annual Alyce T. Guettler Hunger Run, starting and ending on my beloved campus next Saturday, January 28!

Look at that, it's another Thankful Thursdays all wrapped up and I didn't even mention Downton Abbey or the weather! Whoo hoo!

What are you thankful for this week??